I am a big advocate of being who you are (whomever that may be at any given time).
You should always love yourself. Love your flaws. Embrace them.
There is a reason that not everyone looks the same. There is a reason you have different interests than your neighbor.
We are unique beings and even though this is true, we, as a society, as human beings, strive to fit in with the group.
We do. It’s human nature.
So, I get it.
I certainly have fallen victim to the trends and the peer pressure and the assumed role of being a white woman in America.
I wish I didn’t.
I wish I was pure, true, 100% individual.
My sister is that way, and it is something I have always been jealous of.
Ah anyway. I digress.
So the whole point of this blog is to love yourself BEFORE you try to love anyone else. It will not end well.
How could you ever be yourself with that person. You wouldn’t. You would mold yourself to fit their idea of what they would like in a mate.
And if you are not that originally then you just shouldn’t be together.
Because you should never HAVE to change for someone for them to love you
I can NOT stress that enough ladies.
I lived it.
Hell, up until my divorce, it was every relationship I have ever been in.
I lived for the other person, never asking for anything in return. I was the true definition of a people pleaser. I gave them everything. And because of that ladies I was walked on, and manipulated, and attracted people who took advantage of me.
Because I let them.
Because I did not love myself.
Because I thought it was all I deserved and [who would I be without them?]
I needed them.
Then I got divorced. I left my husband. And it all changed.
It was my [ rock bottom] and my ultimate low and it took being on the ground, and having nothing but myself to pick me up to make see how special I was and how someone would be LUCKY to have ME.
I am not being vain.
I just opened my eyes to all the wonderful things about me!
I looked back at myself and thought “why were so worried he would leave you for someone else. Someone better?”
“Why did you not DEMAND more respect and stand up for yourself?”
Answer: Because I did not love myself.
You should not ever Google: how to keep him interested.
Here’s how to keep him interested.
You be yourself.
You find someone who loves the way you look when you are sleeping, and your freckles, and your laugh.
Look, movies and books make romance seem like a breeze and create unrealistic expectations about love and dating.
But you know that moment when the girl looks away and the guy just stares at her?
That’s very real.
Do not settle for anything less.
Love yourself before you love someone else.