To the man who honked at me on my way home….

Dear all men who have ever honked at me; I’m sorry.

 I am sorry that you grew up thinking it was ok to honk your horn at me, or any other woman. I’m sorry that you watched your Dad do it or your grandpa do it, and thought it was appropriate or cool. 

It’s not. 

I took a quick walk today to bring Greg his wallet after he left it at home, and on my way home, you honked at me. You, a strange man I’ve never met, drove past me and honked at me. 

And do you know what happened? 

Well, I certinally did not feel flattered. 

No, I felt scared. I tensed up, and gripped my keys in my hand into a makeshift weapon, because I’ve read one too many stories about men who don’t take rejection well. 

Some of you may be thinking “well, she was probably wearing something sexy or looked really hot” 

If any one of you thought that, shame on you. 

Stop victim blaming. 

That is why we have men like Brock Turner raping women, and then getting off basically scott free. 

 I don’t wear my clothes for validation or compliments. 

You don’t need to help grow my self worth, I’ve been planting my own garden for years.

AND, if I did want to show off my body or something I was wearing ….or not wearing, there are plenty of venues I could go and do exactly that; but none of them are outside on the sidewalk. 

For those still stuck in the mindset about what I was wearing, here, I’ll ease your curiousity…..

Do I have to wear a snowsuit? 

It doesn’t matter what I was wearing. I want to be able to walk anywhere I damn well please with being honked at. 

I want to be able to visit my aunt downtown and not have a man lean out his window and yell “hey baby girl, what’s up” 

(I flipped that guy off)

I don’t want to have to raise my future daughter to fear men; to always walk in a group and carry pepper spray and check her drink when she goes to a party. 

But sadly, that’s the world we live in. 

We live in a world where a girl gets raped and our first questions are “was she drinking?”and “what was she wearing?”

We restrict what girls wear to school because we don’t want to distract the boys, instead of teaching the boys to stop seeing women as objects. 

So how do we fix this? 

We start by teaching our boys to stop honking at girls, and then we stop doing it ourselves. 

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